Why does Marcus keep playing dumb games instead of doing his goelogy. No one knows.

What's the difference between mustangs and dead babies I don't collect mustangs

Where does a homeless person live? No where

Dislike if you shag sheep ;)

What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

What does a baby sound like when put in the microwave? I don't know, I was masturbating.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know your mother is a skank.

An Irishman walked out of a bar. A Frenchman was polite. An Englishman had beautiful teeth.

Paige

HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the farmer cross the road? To pick up the dead chicken

I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Hide him under your coat.

Why did the boy dress up as a zombie? Because it was Halloween.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

What do you call children with no arms or legs ...their names

The chicken hesitated to cross the road. It pondered endlessly on the ramifications of not crossing the road, the future jokes that would never have been made. So it crossed the road with no real purpose for others to come up with unique ideas. Just kidding there is no proof that chickens have ever existed. There is proof that Barack Obama is a woman, however.

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

Whats even funnier than watching two black guys with guns attempting to shoot people Just about everything

Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

How do you confuse a blonde? You ask her a question.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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