What do you call an Indian cook, that cooks in a Chinese restaurant? A chef

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken got crushed by a fridge.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No, he hasn't either

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What does the cup-cake say to the cake? Do you want a cup in your cake to make it cup-cake?

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69

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A young girl falls off a swing, she is paralysed from the neck down and unable to walk every agian.

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Why did the black man rob a KFC? He was in a very difficult financial situation and was worried his kids would go homeless. After scouting various locations he found the security at a nearby KFC was non-existent.

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What do you call a man who writes anti-jokes? Rhys, because that is my name. thank you

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When there's something weird in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know your mother is a skank.

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

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Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Roses are red Violets are blue But this is Italy So let me fuck you

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My Friday was going great until i realized it's Thursday...

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What did polyvore say to wanelo? Nothing They are apps

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. No he doesn't.

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Moves Like AJgger- Marron 5

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A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

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What's the easiest way to burn calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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What is Green and taste like an apple? An Apple

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a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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