Roses are red violets are blue I hate rhyming pancakes

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What did the senile man say to the kids on his lawn? Tree dance the gator thong for my nipples.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody, because first, pineapples are too small to fit in, and second, you would drown.

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Why I the kid still at school? His mom was brutally run over by a car

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Why does Marcus keep playing dumb games instead of doing his goelogy. No one knows.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? *cause 7 8 9? NO cause 7 was a nigga!

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Your mom's so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and foods with nutritional value!!!! Oh burn!!!!

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Why did he buy ANTIJOKE THE BOOK! - ? Because he wanted to read it.

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Why do vampires suck the blood of their victims? Because blood is very nutritious and provides more iron for heamoglobin.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a black man A pizza can feed a family of four

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the farmer cross the road? To pick up the dead chicken

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Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

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An elephant and a llama walk into a bar. Realizing that they must have broken out of the local zoo, all of the people run out of the bar screaming.

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Whats funny about a car crash? If a bowl of soup is talking.

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Have you ever seen that clown at walmart that hides from gay people?

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ARE YOU READY FOR THE OLDEST ANTIJOKE EVER WRITTEN: HERE IT COMES....... THE MOST ANCIENT OF THEM ALL...... ARE YOU READY?????? HERE WE GO...... Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! THAT'S RIGHT. THIS IS IN FACT AN ANTI JOKE - "...ends with such an anti climax...the lack of punchline is the punchline."

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69

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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Me:I talk to myself to much. Me:Same

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What did Darth Vader say when he spilled his drink? Darth Vader is a fictional character and is not a part of humanity.

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What do you do when a elephant is sitting on your fence? You hit it with a fridge

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I was in the middle of downloading a porno of two hot girls getting it on, my computer got a virus and crashed.

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I don't know what I've been told I'm a refrigerator

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Roses are red Violets are blue But this is Italy So let me fuck you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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