I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

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An Asian child flunks a test.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Hide him under your coat.

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Somewhere, sometime in the world a man leads his country prominently in an era of change. He makes beautiful and strong speeches to his people. He also kills millions of Jewish people. No seriously, he kills millions of people it's great.

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I'm tired of your blind jokes, I just don't see the humor in them........

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What's the difference between mustangs and dead babies I don't collect mustangs

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"Ask me if I am a Lemon?" "Are you a Lemon?" "Yes, ask me if I'm an Orange" "No, I'm a Lemon."

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The chicken hesitated to cross the road. It pondered endlessly on the ramifications of not crossing the road, the future jokes that would never have been made. So it crossed the road with no real purpose for others to come up with unique ideas. Just kidding there is no proof that chickens have ever existed. There is proof that Barack Obama is a woman, however.

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

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Knock-Knock. Who's there? The person knocking at your door.

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Your mom's so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and foods with nutritional value!!!! Oh burn!!!!

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing you already told her twice

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Robin get in the car.

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Why did the black man get the grape soda? It was the only soda left.

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Ask me if I'm a flower. Are you a flower? No.

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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An elephant and a llama walk into a bar. Realizing that they must have broken out of the local zoo, all of the people run out of the bar screaming.

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What did the senile man say to the kids on his lawn? Tree dance the gator thong for my nipples.

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Friends are like snow: If you piss on them, they disappear.

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Bob fell off his roof.

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whats long black, eight inches and sometimes has white on the tips of them? a black mans foot the wears an eight inch shoe.

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What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

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A horse walks into a bar, it gets a concussion. -mattobrado

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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