What's the square root of four? Two.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will it be? Sarah Jessica Parker replies, i'll have 4 cosmopolitans for me and my friends.

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Why did nick and tyler visit anti-joke.com? Because they have nothing better to do.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, this joke sucks.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What kind of society have we created that a chicken can't even cross a road without his motives being questioned?

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A tiger walks into a bar. Clearly there is something wrong with animal control.

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What did the man say to his wife? We are both men. Apart from you.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

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Q: Whats worse than the death of flappy bird? A: The holocaust.

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Why did Hellen Keller masturbate with her left hand? Because her right hand was tired.

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What did 6 say to 7? Nothing, numbers are abstract concepts thought up by humans and therefore, they cannot speak or converse in any sort of language.

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Bob- yo mammas soo fat tha.. Joe- I know...

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What is 6 plus 9? 15.

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why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was a Women

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I believe that as long as we do not change, as we decide to believe in ourselves and use our strength and potential, all that is left, is to see which side fate favors. Maybe we are meant to survive trough our strength and belief in ourselves and each other, or maybe we are, or will eventually end up as the last people of our kind, and fade away from life, proving that those that trust in the corrupt, where better than us. Suddenly I feel so alone.

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How do you know that god was a male? You don't, that's why it's called faith.

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A man walks into a 1980's style restaurant he takes a seat and orders his meal.

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LeBron James hits a game winning three with time running out in the Finals.

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What do you call two gay black men? Homosexuals.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue Bitches Like U Belong In The Zoo

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Why does Marcus keep playing dumb games instead of doing his goelogy. No one knows.

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How do you become thinner in a week? Stand in front of a Bulldozer.

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Why did the man mow his lawn without his shirt on? Because it was very hot out.

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I enjoy the fact that the jokes I post that do not make me laugh, are the ones that get zero thumbs, while those that at least make me smile, get at least a couple, I admit thought that its hard to keep track with me, I type jokes so fast that they disappear in the back before people can thumb them... Have you heard... Of the dog that was barking up the wrong three? The three said: Damn dog! I am not a tree! The dog kept barking, as dogs do not speak. Moral: Numbers speak fluently in most languages though...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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