If file gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

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Bob fell off his roof.

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Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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Doctor, people always laught at me at work! :( What do you do for a living? I am a comedian...

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So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

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Why did the cow jump over the moon? He cant jump over the moon due to low gravity

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Whats the easiest way to solve problems in Haiti? Nuke them.

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How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? *cause 7 8 9? NO cause 7 was a nigga!

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How many Polish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? My dad is dead.

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What do you do when a elephant is sitting on your fence? You hit it with a fridge

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Roses are red Violets are blue But this is Italy So let me fuck you

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer-pressure.

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Whats funny about a car crash? If a bowl of soup is talking.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? If you eat a Jew, you're deemed a cannibal and are frowned upon by the majority of society.

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69

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

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What is green and invisible? This cabbage.

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Why did the Black man cross the street? To get to the other side.

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Bryce Harlan and I are close friends Love, Pete K

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? George. George Who? George Smith.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being shot repeatedly in the chest.

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Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

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ARE YOU READY FOR THE OLDEST ANTIJOKE EVER WRITTEN: HERE IT COMES....... THE MOST ANCIENT OF THEM ALL...... ARE YOU READY?????? HERE WE GO...... Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! THAT'S RIGHT. THIS IS IN FACT AN ANTI JOKE - "...ends with such an anti climax...the lack of punchline is the punchline."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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