7

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a guy walked into my house and asked "why do you do the beep test every arvo?" i suddenly replied, im matt minors i get chicks

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Roses are red violets are orange......... Wait did I do that wrong?

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How many chicken feathers are there in a 50 pound bag? 50 pounds worth Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a duck Why did the man cross the road? It was duck season A woman is dying but can't reach her husband. Why? A duck ate his cell-phone A pig walks into a bar but there is no bartender. Where is she? Dead A duck hunter is selling a duck to a man. The man only pays the duck hunter a quarter. Why? It was full of chicken feathers.

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A young blonde walks into a bar and orders a shot of tequila. After about a few minutes she spots this very ugly man with one leg. The man just so happens to sit right next to her and orders a drink. The man reeks of cockroaches and he looks like a homeless man that hasn't bathed in months. They never talk and the blonde goes home.

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Yo mamma's so fat, at her last annual checkup her attending physician informed her that if she did not attempt to control her weight gain through a careful moderation of her diet and began exercising on a regular basis, that her obesity would soon manifest itself in a variety of chronic health conditions that would permanently alter her ability to enjoy life and could significantly decrease her lifespan.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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A bear walked into a bar, unfortunately there were no survivors.

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Whats worse than having aids...... Being in school

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Why do blacks run away from whites? Because god told all people to never go to the light.

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What happened to those who survived the attack on Hiroshima? They were killed in Nagasaki

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Why do Chinese people have flat faces? Air bags.

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Why do gay guys like push pops? Because they are a delicious lollipop treat.

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A horse walks into a bar and doesnt order a drink. Because he cant.

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What do you think JFK would be doing if he was alive today? Yelling for help and trying to somehow escape his coffin.

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I what's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? I don't have 10 watermelons in my basement.

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what does the homeless man do when he gets home? nothing, he's homeless

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Whats green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A golf course

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Life is like a box of chocolates. Well...not really no. It's not.

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How do you stop a second date from happenin? You force a dead mouse in your date's vagina.

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If life gives you lemons, Eat them.

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What did my Grandmother get for Christmas? Alzheimer's.

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How do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? Push 1000 Ethiopians off a cliff

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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