my name is Jacob sartorious

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What did the rapper Proof say when he got in a fight? Nothing, Proof is dead.

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What dud the baseball player do when he struck out? Walked back to the bench

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because while he was swinging, his friends dared him to jump off and called him a chicken when he didn't. Still hesitant, he tried to jump off, but his arm caught on the swing chain and he fell face first into the tanbark. He needs reconstructive surgery to repair his face.

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Did you hear about the man who thought his wife was trying to kill him? He's dead.

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What's worse than getting Ebola? Nothing

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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What did one dog say to the other dog? Woof woof

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what can you give to a millionaire to make him happy? sex

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what did the black man say to the white girl? He respectfully asked her out on a date and theyve been happily dateing ever since.

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My aunt said slow and steady wins the race....... She died in a fire

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What do you call a dragon with no wings? A komodo dragon

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely ask him to come down

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Why does blond women give great blowjob? Because they has vaacum in thier heads! Blond woman coment; well thats better than having nothing at all in your head! :-)

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? It's illegal to eat the Jew.

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A guy walks in to a bar, waving a gun around. He acidentally shoots himself in the foot He died from the bloodloss.

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Two blondes get in a taxi. Who's driving? The taxi driver.

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What is white and stands in the corner? A refridgerator who has been very bad...

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Your mother is a stupid bitch. For real.

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Knock knock Who's there Banana Bananas can't talk. Crap he's on to me

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Obama getting elected in 2012.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because someone was chasing it with an axe.

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F: what is BLUE and has 400 whells ? Q: NOTHING !!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops