Whats worse then losing your phone? The Holocaust

Why did little Jimmy cry when his Rolls Royce got destroyed? Because his parents were in it.

How do you make a plumber sad? Steal his plums.

Why was Martin Luther King Jr. Shot? Because he was black.

How many WOMEN does it take to change a light bulb? YOU ALREADY KNOW ITS GONNA BE MORE THAN ONE!

What's black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, mixed-race babies.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

What do dead babies and trash both have in common? They're both in my dumpster.

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws. Because they have razor sharp edges and can slice through flesh very easily, posing a potential threat if possessed by a violent person.

How do you lose your train of thought? You can't. It is impossible to fit a full size locomotive in the human skull.

Q: What do you call a black person with one leg? A: In modern American society, it is proper etiquette to adress somebody by their first name.

Why do babies cry on airplanes? Because gay people are getting married.

What has a bomb straped to itself and has wheels? Me. I lied about the wheels.

What did the watermelon say to the apple? Nothing. Watermelons are fruits and incapable of speech.

A man rode into town on Friday and stayed a while and then left on Friday how did he manage this?

Matt is not funny.

Two cats were in a bathtub. They both, however, were uneasy the whole time, as it is common sense to know that cats do not like being in water.

PLEASE DONT READ THIS OR YOU'LL BE DIED IF YOU DON'T POST MESSAGE ON LIKE DIFFERENT VIDEO

What's funnier than the world ending? Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder in a staring contest.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

Why did carly drop her groceries Carly is a cow

What do you call an old widow with 12 cats? Forever alone.

whats black and blue and red all over? my wife shhh!

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time to call animal control.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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