Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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What does Tupac and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead but most of the people think they aren't.

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Two cannibals were eating a man, one at the top and one at the bottom. The cannibal at the top said, "are you having fun down there?" The cannibal at the bottom said, "yeah, I'm having a ball!"

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Yo momma so fat when god said let there be light he said get the fuck out the way!

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I just farted, and now I have to Chit!

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Knock Knock Whos There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Radley.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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a boy walks into the doctors office."my knees hurt...i poked it like this"the doctor says "listen kid...u are a really good kid but u didnt really injure your knee and im sick of you!!"

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Q: What Would You Call Someone Who is 6 Foot and hairy. Answer: By His Or Her Name.

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roses are red violets are blue no one likes raisen bran except your mom

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Why was the alcoholic unable to pass a stool when he sat down on the toilet? Because he did it on the floor.

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Why did the little kid color outside the lines? He had Parkinson's Disease.

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Roses are red Voilets are blue I have a gun Get in the Van

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Why did Sally fall off her bike? Because she had no legs. Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. What did Sally get for Christmas? Cancer. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally...

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why was the little girl crying? because she was molested

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Why was Mrs. Clause mad at Santa Clause? Because he was hanging out with three hoes, Ho, Ho, and Ho

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Why did people on a plane die? Because it crashed.

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? If they didn't, their turnout gear would not effectively protect them from flames.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to buy plus size clothes because small size clothes would be inappropriate for her to wear.

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Because he was dangerously fatigued from staying up all night weeping passionately into the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of twenty years after the CEO of the company declared bankruptcy and finding out that his only daughter was in the hospital in critical condition after her school bus flipped off a bridge.

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Did I tell you about the day I put PaulMckenna on a hypnotic state so he believed he put me in a trance? That was fun, everybody applauded, then he got sad when it was not him they where applauding at, funny guy, a bit of an amateur, he spends hours "priming" people in a hypnotic state, and then in his videos triggers it so it makes it seem like he does it instantly, next to Igor Ledohowsky and Richard Bandler, I might just be one of the best and youngest hypnotists alive. Speaking of which, my wife knows the complicated yet strong feelings I got for you, and feels safe around me because of the same reasons you do, and the fact that I can spot a worry and a tear before people do, especially those I love and care about. Wait I am not done, I just need to eat before I space out.

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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses? Because they often have to interact with violent and distrustful criminals.

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -A kazoo. -A kazoo who? -A small, simple musical instrument consisting of a hollow pipe with a hole in it, over which is a thin covering that vibrates and produces a buzzing sound when the player sings or hums into the pipe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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