- Anti Joke

Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

So I took this girl into my room we got in bed, We got under the covers and.... We had a rather delightful game of scrabble.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and deaf, and to put her behind the wheel of a motorized vehicle would be extremely dangerous.

If life throws you melons, not only might you be dyslexic, but you are probably also uneducated, since the phrase is "if life gives you lemons".

Why did the Mexican man jump to the floor? He had a stroke.

How do you fit 4 homosexuals onto a barstool? You make the barstool wider allowing for all the men to sit more comfortably on top of the stool.

if you watched wife-swap years ago, you'll remember that one family that bought anything they could because they didnt have to pay till 12-21-12 because they thought the world would end LOL FUN FAMILY NOW HUH

How do you give a women more freedom? Shoot her in the face with a shotgun.

a woman came back from a long vacation, one of her male employes noticed that her breast were much larger, "wow, did you get a boob job?" he asked. she replied "no i have breast cancer"

Why did the african jump in the swimming pool? Because it was a really hot day and he wanted to cool down

what happens when 15 babies cross the street? well, some may be hit by cars. others will have to face the harsh life of reality.

why did u fart to loud? because you butt said so

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

your mom is like a lowling ball, she likes to be fingered then thrown back into the gutter

What's the difference between a turtle and a fish? Turtles aren't fish.

Where do fat girls go to eat doughnuts? Jenny Craig

Whats funny about the Holocaust? Nothing.

why did the cow eat the seahorse/ because my shift keys are broken1

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Plenty of things

Every time im sad, I think of a T-Rex trying to put on a hat.

So I took this girl into my room we got in bed, We got under the covers and.... We had a rather delightful game of scrabble.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and deaf, and to put her behind the wheel of a motorized vehicle would be extremely dangerous.

If life throws you melons, not only might you be dyslexic, but you are probably also uneducated, since the phrase is "if life gives you lemons".

Why did the Mexican man jump to the floor? He had a stroke.

How do you fit 4 homosexuals onto a barstool? You make the barstool wider allowing for all the men to sit more comfortably on top of the stool.

if you watched wife-swap years ago, you'll remember that one family that bought anything they could because they didnt have to pay till 12-21-12 because they thought the world would end LOL FUN FAMILY NOW HUH

spell backwards: taco cat

How do you give a women more freedom? Shoot her in the face with a shotgun.

a woman came back from a long vacation, one of her male employes noticed that her breast were much larger, "wow, did you get a boob job?" he asked. she replied "no i have breast cancer"

Why did the african jump in the swimming pool? Because it was a really hot day and he wanted to cool down

what happens when 15 babies cross the street? well, some may be hit by cars. others will have to face the harsh life of reality.

why did u fart to loud? because you butt said so

Penis.

A black guy gets a job...

Land Rovers

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her...

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

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