What did the girl say when she arrived at the party? "I like what you did with the furniture!"

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An asian, mexican, and a black guy walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "get the hell out"

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knock knock whos there? knock knock whos there knock knock you final decide to open the door to find a deaf man needing directions.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had Gonorrhea.

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"I see," said the blind man to the deaf man.

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How can you shed 10 pounds in one day? Get your legs amputed.

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Blonde: I'm sad. Brunette: Why? Blonde: I walked into a bar just to see my boyfriend having a drink with another woman, Brunette: I'm so sorry,

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A. Knock, Knock B. Come in

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Why didn't Charlie Sheen lose? Because he's always winning.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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Why couldn't the mexican buy a boat? Because he couldn't afford it

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What is the cow doing? Because 7,8,9

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Knock Knock Who's there? I said who's there? The man opens the door to find there was no one there and begins to shake in fear as his schizophrenia is getting worse.

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Why couldn't Harry Potter get a job at Mc Donalds? Because he isn't real.

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Q: What Would You Call Someone Who is 6 Foot and hairy. Answer: By His Or Her Name.

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What do you get when you have 10 kids in a church? A lot of rape cases.

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What did the lonely old man get on valentines day? Nothing, because his wife died of cancer two years ago.

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A African American male and a Mexican male are both in a car, who is driving? Most likely the owner or the car.

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Dance is a sport

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What do you get when you cross a joke and a rhetorical question?

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? The Pilot. You racist bastard.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Cut the rope.

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Wal-mart didn't have the product I wanted. So I yelled at the manager until they had it. It didn't work and i was taken to jail.

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So a guy walks into a bar. He asks the woman next to him, ''Can I buy you a drink?'' The woman says,''No thank you.''

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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