How do you kill zombie Jesus? You can't.

Why was Steve hungry? Because the last time he ate was yesterday.

What do you call Americas first black president? A change.

Roses are red Violets are red Shit My garden's on fire?

Roses are red, Violets are VIOLET!

Two Jews walk into a bar. They promptly order their drinks and then leave.

WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN DANII AND SCAFFHOLDING? ONLY ONE STILL HAS A POLE 1 LIKE = 1 TEAR FOR DANII

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

what do mexicans enjoy eating? food.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocost

Roses are red, violets are blue, i suck at poetry, show me your tits!

"What would you do if i gave you a million dollars?" "I would scream and jump up and down? Are you really gonna give me a million dollars?" "No i just wanted to see what you would have said, that's all"

A brown haired girl and a blonde girl are driving through a cornfield. Because of this illegal activity, they are sent to court and given 8 years in the state prison.

Are you from Africa? Because you're black.

When life gives you lemon squeeze it in someone's face

Why did the Jew run across the road? To get to the other side.

A dyslexic woman goes into a saloon and asks for a hair cut. Oh right, she doesn't have hair! Then why the f*** would she enter the saloon? Because she wanted to get her nails done. But she doesn't have nails either, and she doesn't want to drink. She came there because she wanted to hook up with a guy!

What can eat, sleep, and reproduce? Not a rock, that's for sure.

irish wristwatch JLR

Suzie was in a traumatizing accident resulting in her arms getting cut off. Knock Knock? Whos There? Not Suzie.

BenWuzHear

knock knock who's there? It's Jim we haven't seen each other since college Why hello there come on in

What's funnier than the world ending? Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder in a staring contest.

What did the martian say to the other martian when he saw a fire hydrant? "Hey look, I found a fire hydrant!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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