Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had an appointment with his hair stylist. Just kidding chicken don't have hair.

What's the square root of four? Two.

A woman's opinion

I am darkness, soon I shall rule the world, those of you that desire to serve me thumb this up, those of you that desire eternal fear beyond your imagination, thumb me down. Moral: Try thinking of me and thinking "he is crazy", in order to unlock the secrets behind spontaneous human combustion.

What the black guy say to the Jew during the blizzard? I think it's snowing.

It’s dead.

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Everyone is amazed because he can now walk.

Why did the feminist cross the road? To suck a penis

Rosa Parks is going to be here if she gets to the bus on time!

Dislike if you shag sheep ;)

I enjoy the fact that the jokes I post that do not make me laugh, are the ones that get zero thumbs, while those that at least make me smile, get at least a couple, I admit thought that its hard to keep track with me, I type jokes so fast that they disappear in the back before people can thumb them... Have you heard... Of the dog that was barking up the wrong three? The three said: Damn dog! I am not a tree! The dog kept barking, as dogs do not speak. Moral: Numbers speak fluently in most languages though...

Why did the business man move to New York? Because he saw a potential business opportunity that could benefit him and his loving family.

Whats the difference between a ham sandwich and a dead baby sandwich? I don't stomp on my ham sadnwiches with cleats before I eat them.

Why did the one-legged chicken say déjà vu? It felt a strong sensation that the current event had been experienced in the past.

What do old people really like? Anal sex.

Q: Why didn't the Government help the poor little boy? A: Because he was taking a test and that would be cheating.

Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

Q: Why couldn't Katie ride a bike? A: Because she has leprosy.

What did the senile man say to the kids on his lawn? Tree dance the gator thong for my nipples.

Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

The man who killed hitler must have ben a swell dude a.w. j.p.

Why did child's mom cry when he was born? The child had no head.

Why were the floors of the movie theaters so sticky? Spilled beverages.

Q: What's funny about prostitution? A: Nothing. It's a widely misunderstood profession.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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