What stands on the corner oof every major city at night? A cop

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

thumb_up thumb_down +43

If you have 5 dollars, and Chuck Norris has 5 dollars, you are both very poor.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why does Reid always have a blank stare on his face? Because he is constantly searching for the answer as to why his sister was raped, stabbed, and burned alive all right in front of his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why did the redneck ask his daughter to get on her knees? His shoe was untied.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Yo mamas so fat that she slowly had developed obstructive sleep apnea syndrome and had died due to an obstruction of her upper airway while she was sleeping.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why couldn't the Asian drive? He was blind

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How do you make a Russian baby cry? Punch it in the face

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Whats small, red and white, and would kill you if shot out of a cannon? A decapitated baby

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not sure but my guess is that there was some logical reasoning behind the action.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What is a person who can hold there breath for an hour? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the Jew have very bad gas? He had very rough anal sex and air got stuck up his bum

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

*spongebob voice* 25

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's the difference between a North Korean and a South Korean? Nothing, they're both chinese.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

knock, knock whos there the police your son was the victim of a cruel homocide

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the cow have a pain in his stomach. It has testicular cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Q: What is the difference between a Ginger and a shoe? A: A shoe has a sole

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A man walks into a bar what does he say Ouch

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What starts with F and ends with Uck? F U C K

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A man goes into a bar. What are mangos doing in a bar?

thumb_up thumb_down +33

That's not what she said.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

This sentence is false.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops