Whats worse than 911..? The plane ride there.

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A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you."

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You are so ugly that plastic surgery may be an option for you to consider.

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what's the difference between a dog and a sheep? one's a dog and the other isn't.

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how do you blindfold an asian...a piece of dental floss

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What is an old ginger lady's favorite type of bread? Whole wheat.

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A cow walks into the butcher shop, he looks around then mourns the loss of his brothers

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Why did the mentally challenged man enter the bar? He's tired of being subject hate and criticism. He hates being the subject of jokes and being pointed at. He may not be able to tell you what 3x6 is, but he still has feelings. So because of all these inconsiderate people judging him, he now spends his days at the local bar, drowning his sorrows away in alcohol. I hope your happy.

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This is a joke setup.

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How did my grand parents go about surviving the holocaust? Well, for starters, they weren't Jewish, they never lived in Germany, and to be honest, my grandparents probably would have supported the Nazi's because they are right wing pricks

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A man walks into a bar, he begins drinking and returns home visably drunk. His family disowns him as he is a recovering alchoholic who was three months sober.

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Why didn't God show up to Jesus' bar mitzvah? Because he doesn't exist.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? because she was SHITFACED!!!!

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what did johnny's mom do for his 50th birthday? she died

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Whats worse than a pile of dead baby's? Being raped by a giant scorpion. Well that escalated quickly. Also i'm gonna call the cops.

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A mormon walks into a bar. He orders a caffeine free Coke.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate black people, and mexicans too.

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how do you starve a man who is on welfare? hide his food stamps under his work boots.

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I had a great joke to tell you. I didn't want people stealing my ideas so I didn't write it. Haha

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How many elephants can you fit in a car? depends how big the car is!

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Is this the krusty krab? NO! THIS IS red lobster, how many i help you?

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Why was six afraid of seven? because seven had diarrhea

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your momma's so fat i almost didn't have sex with her.... almost.

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How do you drown a down syndrome child? Put him/her into water.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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