What's the difference between a water melon and a baby? One's fun to hit with a sledge hammer, the other's just a water melon.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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What did Jesus say last before being nailed to the cross? I don't know, It never happened. ...Why did he say that? He didn't, it's not real.

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Why was a group of children being driven away by a black man? Michael was the students bus driver, he was taking them to the zoo.

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Why did the fat guy survive the plain crash He didn't he died like everyone else

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adam sucks off disabled old men for a pac of biscuits

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Is the capitol of Michigan pronounced DEE-troit or de-TROIT? It's pronounced Lansing.

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Yo momma so lazy she hasn't been to work in weeks and you no longer have electricity or food.

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Your mother is so bad at cooking that people often remark on how bad at cooking she is.

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Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them, they die.

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your momma is so fat that she thinks someone hugs her each time she passes through a door

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What did the Lightning Bolt say to the Thunder Cloud? WATTSup?

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Why did the whale cross the ocean? To reproduce as a way of life.

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What are pirate movies rated ? P.g 13 for violence and coarse language.

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A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

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How do you stop a black kid from bouncing on the bed? Put Velcro on the cealing.

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where do you find sunglasses at? the store

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Where did Suzy go during the bombing? Everywhere

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Whats your name? Bill. I have a son named Kevin.

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Ever had sex while camping? It's great.

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Why couldn't the Black man become a surgeon? He was Blind.

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Bob goes swimming in the ocean. Due to the fact that his father sexually abused him as a child, and never taught him how to swim, he drowns.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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