What do you call a blue penquin dipped in chocolate doing the samba? A blue penquin dipped in chocolate doing the samba!

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lol a man is drowning

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knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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Why did the man suddenly burst into flames in room. The room was dark, so he lit a match. It turns out there was hydrogen in the room and when fire touches hydrogen, it sets on fire.

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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What's black, white, and red all over? Half of a dalmatian.

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Q. What do you get when a banana and a person mate? A. The banana suffocates

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing

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A helicopter was flying around above Seattle when an electrical malfunction disabled all of the aircraft's electronic navigation and communications equipment. Due to the clouds and haze, the pilot could not determine the helicopter's position. The pilot saw a tall building, flew toward it, circled, and held up a handwritten sign that said "WHERE AM I?" in large letters. People in the tall building quickly responded to the aircraft, drew a large sign, and held it in a building window. Their sign said "YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER." The pilot smiled, waved, looked at his map, determined the course to steer to SEATAC airport, and landed safely. After they were on the ground, the copilot asked the pilot how he had done it. "I knew it had to be the Microsoft Building, because they gave me a technically correct but completely useless answer."

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What did the blind football player say to his coach? I cant see

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a man got hit by a truck in brooklyn, JK he got shot, he was in brooklyn, Duh, he stumbled out in to traffic afterwards

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Did you hear the joke about the deaf kid? He didn't either.

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Why couldn't the blonde read the road map? Because she was blindfolded and tied up in the trunk.

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all these jokes suck ass

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69

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Hi

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? gang rape

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You wanna know something that doesn't exist? Grandma's.........that haven't given BLOW JOBS!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. The police who? The POLICE, now open the god damn door!

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What did the kid say when he fell of a cliff and met Tom jones? Hi

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To be eaten.

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Breanna baked a pie. what kind of pie was it? A JIMMY PAI

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Aladdin found a rusty old lamp at the foot of a mountain. He rubbed it and the Ginnie had died after the long drop from the cliff

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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