Ask me if I'm a flower. Are you a flower? No.

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Knock-Knock who's there? Artichoke Artichoke who? Your friend Artie choked on a ham sandwich, and I'm sorry to inform you that he didn't survive.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had an appointment with his hair stylist. Just kidding chicken don't have hair.

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The man who killed hitler must have ben a swell dude a.w. j.p.

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You should really respect vegetables more. They rock. They're all like... AAAHH!!!... and I'm all like... DUDE! THAT'S SO INCREDIBLY RANDOM!... and seriously, you should respect da veggies!

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what did the dog do when he saw the flea?he ate it because he didn't know what would happen next

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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what do you do when a baby screams? shake it.

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How do you kill a 1000 Ethiopians? Throw a biscuit off a cliff. JimBoto

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

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How do you become thinner in a week? Stand in front of a Bulldozer.

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A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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Where does a homeless person live? No where

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It’s dead.

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How do you confuse a blonde? You ask her a question.

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I love you, you live me. Now get the FUDGE out of the tree!!!

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A man walks into a bar. - - - - - - - - -

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What is funnier than this joke? Jokes with higher ratings.

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What never seems to get old? AIDS.

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Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

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Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

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whats black and looks like a bucket a black bucket

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What did the blind boy get for christmas? harry potter transcribed in braille so he could enjoy such a magical world like the rest of us

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what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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