How do you become thinner in a week? Stand in front of a Bulldozer.

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A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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A young girl falls off a swing, she is paralysed from the neck down and unable to walk every agian.

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Why did the people thumbs-up the anti-joke? Because I threatened them with A GUN

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Did you hear about the speed reader on top of the Twin towers? 90 stories 5 seconds.

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? He was hit by a bus!

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I am an orphan I have no parents

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I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

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Ask me if I'm a flower. Are you a flower? No.

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What did the poor sickly orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What do you call a black man that goes to college? A student..

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Whats funny about a car crash? If a bowl of soup is talking.

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Why did the Black man cross the street? To get to the other side.

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What did the blind boy get for christmas? harry potter transcribed in braille so he could enjoy such a magical world like the rest of us

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Why did the girl die? She read Twililght

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ARE YOU READY FOR THE OLDEST ANTIJOKE EVER WRITTEN: HERE IT COMES....... THE MOST ANCIENT OF THEM ALL...... ARE YOU READY?????? HERE WE GO...... Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! THAT'S RIGHT. THIS IS IN FACT AN ANTI JOKE - "...ends with such an anti climax...the lack of punchline is the punchline."

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Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

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If a rooster lays a brown egg on the south side of an Asian man's roof, which way would I turn at the intersection? Folderol, because laundry has no soul.

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Test

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What do you get when you sunflower? Vegan turtles.

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Q. What language cant you speak A.Sign language

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? No.

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Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

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HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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