how many jews can you fit in a buick? six if you squeeze 4 in the back

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What do you call a highschooler who smokes weed, shops at the mall, and has date-raped one girl so far? Popular.

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a man i knew who was a real jerk was about to drive home drunk. i was trying to stop him, but then he punched me in the face. i let him through. he died that night. i texted him all the way

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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please ignore the bottom two 'jokes' as they were written by josh carey and ryan danielz

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From the makers of Call of Duty 1, comes Call of Duty 2.

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar. -sensored-

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Q: Why is my friend gay? A: Because i slept with him.

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roses are black violets are black im blind

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What's the difference between an elephant and a Jew. The elephant has elephant cancer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted to see the CN tower. He was then hit by a fridge dropped by people running tests on the top floor.

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What's the difference between a cow and a fat person. Nothing

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What do you call an Arab on an airplane? A passenger.

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So, same time tomorrow then?

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Why did the squirrel cross the... *Squash*

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Why is 6 scared of 9? Selena Gomez

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A Mexican man is sitting in his mansion.

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you: "hey, is your refrigerater running?" random, confusded individual: "yeah" you: "oh."

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A gay jew walked into a bar. Just kidding, for there was only a red blanket.

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If I have 7 oranges in one hand and 8 oranges in the other, what do I have? Big hands!

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What does a black person use to chop a tree down? An Ask.

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What do you get when you put a frog in a paper shredder? Harshly punished by the Animal Humane Society

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Why did Suzue fall of the swing? The chain broke.

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A Mexican, A Caucasian and An African American walk into a bar. Suddenly, a rival of the African American's pulls up in a used Chevrolet and shoots him 6 times with a semi-automatic handgun. The Mexican and Caucasian are distraught and call 911 immediately. The rival is later arrested and found guilty of murder in the first degree by a jury of his peers. Less than 6 months later, the bar is closed due to the negative stigma surrounding the shooting. Urban life is a harrowing and tough experience that most outsiders will never fully understand.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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