"Well, you done done me and you bet I felt it; I tried to be chill, but then I realized that when used as an adjective, 'chill' refers to the temperature." -Jason Mraz

What do you call an Arab on an airplane? A passenger.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

I wouldn't touch ellen degeneres with a 10 foot lance. However, i would shake her hand with my hand. Lesson: 10 foot lances are no way to touch ppl.

What does Snoop dog wash his clothes with Bleach

Nero the guy that killed four Neo Nazi`s desecrating the funeral of one of my late members in Chile with a revolver hidden in one of the 46 hidden pockets on the inside of his trench jacket with lots of folders here, inside whose only side effect is making me look like I spend a lot more time at the gym, later one of them found me, ran towards the police which laughed at him pointed at me and said: That guy with a prosthetic arm? You dont believe me... Excellent! Nero The Avenger

wat is the difference between rainbows and poop? I LOVE RAINBOWS!

A woman was talking to Ghandi. "Oh wait" He says "I can't, My kids are home"

I'd feel bad for some skinny guy who lived in a very obese family and only got hand me downs.

Oh," the boy says. "Well BUENOS DIAS to you too!!!

Why did the chicken cross the road ? To get to the other side . Unfortunately , there was a car accident and shrapnel from the explosion [caused by gas on fire] cut his head off causing the old woman to faint , and later die a horrible death .

what is an antijoke? a type of comedy in which the joke ends in an antivlimax that it is funny in its own right GDS*

What did the boy with cancer get for christmas Nothing he didnt live that long

How did Muhammed Ali get into Professional Boxing? With a lot of hard work and dedication.

"Do you live in the United States?", said the man. "no." said the other man, "cool beans", said the woman.

knock knock whos there Aids, now you've got it

Why doesn't Santa Claus change his socks on Christmas Eve? Because he isn't real.

There's a Korean Black person and a Mexican on a cliff who jumps first? Who Cares

A horse dies and goes to heaven. He wonders why there aren't any atheists around.

Did you know Hellen Keller's dog ran away? You would have to if your name was RaAeltraERKAERMaelaefa

Dyslexic devil worshippers sell their souls to Santa

A dermatologist walks into a strip club. He tells the stripper she has hives on her back and that she needs to go to a clinic, then gets up from his lap dance and reports her to management.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Becuase as a chicken its intulect this very low so walking in the middle of the street was it's 1st instest. Ther'for it crossed the road and made it to the other side safe. Now please don't ask me a stupid question like that again.

What do Connecticut school kids get at Christmas? Shot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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