When I exited the hospital one day, I spotted a sign saying "Come back soon!" Soon afterwards I saw people protesting to ban dihydrogen monoxide. The next day on tv I saw an ad for a solar powered lightbulb. Then I saw a Gun control poster. I cried, this being the dumbest thing I had seen yet, and the world was certainly doomed due to humanity's general stupidity. I saw a chicken crossing a packed road. Why did the chicken feel the urge to cross the road?

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If I had 10 cents for every time a hobo asked for change i still wouldn't give him any money

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Your mama's so poor, that it's hard for her to pay her bills.

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Your mama's so fat that she killed herself because she was so depressed about her weight.

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What's brown and sticky? Shit

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3 thieves are also murderers and naked at the moment.

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knock, knock come in

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What did the Dinosaur say to the other dinosaur when he saw a huge meteor? Oh hey look a meteor.

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Q: Why was George Washington buried on a hill? A: Because he's dead.

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Two people went to a planetarium to see a movie about the solar system. They came out smarter than when they had first walked in.

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Q. Why did the boy throw up on the bus? A. All his friends around him died in the accident

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''thanks for giving me back the money i lent you david''-said nobody

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How do you make time fly? You throw a clock out a window.

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its was amazinglysmooth fuck off

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What is 0% sugar, 100% pure, 150% hyperbole, 90% bug-free, has 4815162342 lines of code, autonomous, is awesome, bigger than a breadbox, bread is pain, is bringin' home the bacon, classy, doesn't use the U-word, deja vu, deja vu (oh wait a moment), does barrel rolls doesn't avoid double negatives, doesn't bother with clones, Engage!, Enhanced!, Euclidean!, Excitement!, Exploding creepers, Finally complete!, finger-licking, full of stars, funky LOL, GOTY, Give Us Gordon, Indev, Ingots, and has an End? Minecraft!

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Jimmy was skipping in the park one day when a young boy stopped him. "Hello there, would you like to be friends? We can go behind the old oak tree and play soccer!" asked the boy. "Ok!" replied Jimmy, and they went off together to play. The so-called 'young boy' was actually a wanted midget rapist. Jimmy was brutally raped and filmed. The film was later uploaded onto the internet where it blew up in a matter of weeks. Jimmy had to move schools 6 times and had to go to counselling every week. He finds it hard making friends and later went on to become a heavy cocaine addict.

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A black man walks into a bar and says, "ouch."

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Why was the crazy person allowed to leave the asylum? The ombusman's report will be on your desk this morning minister.

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a man walked into a bar.... when i say bar i mean a metal pole, the man suffered from concussion

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What do you call a black cop? Officer.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? Still a pilot.

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What's the worst place to land when parachuting off an airplane? A. In the middle of an ocean B. In a war zone C. Inside an active volcano D. In a justin beiber concert

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Knock, Knock Why did you just say knock knock?

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25

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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