Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead.

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Im thinking of a very long word..... L O N G

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Why can't Albert Einstein hold down a job? Because he's dead.

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Breaydn Simmons walked into a bar

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Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

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When's the best time to go to the dentist? There is no best time, it is based on personal opinion and depending whether or not you have a conflicting schedule

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How many cows does it take to put in a lightbulb? Well, you see, it depends how many cows it takes to put in a lightbulb.

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how do you starve a man who is on welfare? hide his food stamps under his work boots.

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what is black and green and red all over q: Nothing, you cant have 3 colors on the same surface

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If you rape a prostitute is it shop lifting?

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Roses are white Violets are black I'm colorblind That is sad

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I AM SOFA KING WE TOD HEAD - AV

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what do you get when you cross a man and a horse? Collision

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Two english guys meet at work

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Spongebob: Patrick! Can you hear me? Patrick: No, it's too dark.

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Lol! Why you wanna know?

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Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them, they die.

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What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

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There once was a man from nantucket. But he moved to California after he won the State lottery.

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YOU AINT GOT NO PANCAKE MIX the preacher then bitchslaps the black man

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hi im phill

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why did u fart to loud? because you butt said so

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What would people call Michael Jackson if he became president? Probably President Jackson

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"What do you call a man who has bumblebee wings and fire for blood?" (The doctor on the other line has no answer. Tom desperately weeps into the phone, trying to grasp his sudden transformation. He finds no reassurance, and hangs up the phone.)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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