What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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Why was the boy's face red? He put his cat in a blender.

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A fish and a human had a conversation. The conversation was not interesting because fish can't speak and the human felt awkward.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The middle one is for you

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Roses are red violets are orange......... Wait did I do that wrong?

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"The hills are alive..." Impossible, hills can never be alive.

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How do you get a little kid out of a tree Throw a jar of foreskin at him

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Knock knock. Who's there? Louis. Louis? Go away!!! Your jokes are so bad! Geez, you guys really don't like me. GET OUT!!! (Door slams; Louis shuffles away with a sad look on his face) -Louis

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knock knock who's there your family just died your family just died who? -.-

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None.

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A blonde walks into an electronics store to buy a toaster, the shopkeeper tells her that they do not serve blondes. She sues for discrimination and receives a considerable cash settlement while the shopkeeper looses his store and reluctantly works at a fast food franchise.

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What's the shittiest thing ever ? Poop.

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Knock Knock! Well come on in!

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Obamacare haters

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Gianni

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Max

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A jewish lady is cleaning a house to make some extra money. Its great that she can still find work in this economy.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because her dad through a fridge at her

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? It was moldy and it was a home of many roaches.

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what did one muffin say to the other in the oven? Nothing because they were both baked at 500 degrees and died

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A black man walks into a store and buys something.

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A christian, a Jew, and a muslim walk into a bar. They order their drinks and have a good night because no one knows they are all of different religions.

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Why did the man cross the road? Because the light turned green

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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