What did the sign say at Disney World? Disney World.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a cannibal and like to burn people.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

if life gives you lemons, throw them at pedestrians

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the woman lie down? She was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Doctor: "I'm sorry, but your son has Hepatitis B. Asian Parent: "Why he has Hepatitis B? Why he not get the Hepatitis A plus?"

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Hey I just met you, and this is Crazy, but I think I Love You, so have my baby! ;)

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's made of wood and has an eraser? a 2x4 i lied about the eraser.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How old are you? 20

thumb_up thumb_down +9

jay hefti is so cool and alex askew is hot

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what do you call a deer with no eyes? a deer...

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Six Jews get on a train. They all safely arrive at their locations.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Little Johnny was always bullied at school. Everyday he would get picked on by the same kid, Todd. Todd was a red-headed bully with no discipline. Johnny one day went home and started crying. His father asked the little boy, "Jonny why are you crying?" John replied, "I keep getting bullied". His father stood up and told him, "You must become a big man and step up to him and tell him how you feel. It will surprise him and he will then back off. It always works." Johnny then felt inspired. Later that night he started practicing what he will say in the mirror. By the next morning he felt like he was ready. Johnny was confident about himself for once. He walked up to Todd and told him, "I'm tired of your bullying and next time you will regret it!!". Todd looked surprised and had his jaw opened. Todd then said, "I'm sorry Johnny I didn't know you felt that way." Johnny looked confused. "Here come with me and I'll buy us ice cream". When they went to go get ice cream, Todd brutally stabbed Johnny until he was losing blood and repeatedly raped his dead body.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man see's a bird and tries to get its attention by whistling at it, much like if it were a dog. The mans whistle fails to get the birds attention because birds have wings and dogs do not.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Roses are red, foxes are clever, I like your butt, let me touch it forever!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A black man, a Jew, and a homosexual are at a bar together. They drink for a few hours, during which time they catch up with each other and share stories, as it has been some time since the three of them have seen each other. After they are done drinking, they call a friend, who comes to pick them up and take them home. What a fine example of drinking responsibly.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man walks into a bar.....OW!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q. did u see Stevie wonders new house A. no me. neither did he

thumb_up thumb_down +7

how do you get a clown off a swing??? hit him in the back with an ax!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's the difference between and black dick and a white dick? To get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man accidentally forgets his daughter at a Sizzler

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock Knock, Who's there? Billy. Billy who? Billy your next door neighbor, I need to borrow some sugar. Ok, come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What does the funeral director say at a jewish funeral? Ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is a highly unlikely circumstance due to the fact that there are no wild chickens and most chicken coops are nowhere near a road

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Are you from Tennesse because my uncle grew up there and I was wondering if you knew him.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops