How do you stop a bus? Press the brakes

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Why are elephants gray? So you don't get them confused with blueberries.

I saw a woman get donkey punched in the middle of the street. Nero the clit collector: You know... What is it called when A donkey kinda lifts its front hoove and hits a woman? ...WHAT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR COIN COLLECTION? YOUR STAMPS ARE MURDER! (or something) At least my uh... "Friends" survive... SOMETIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!! ...And then I kill them.

knock knock whos there? knock knock whos there knock knock you final decide to open the door to find a deaf man needing directions.

why did the cute baby start crying?? because its feet were eaten by rats.

What's spotted and has dildos strapped to their neck? Jews

Whats worse then getting hit by a truck? Getting hit by a turkey!

How can you tell if your goldfish is male or female? Put some fishfood in the bowl, if he swims to the food it's a male, if she swims to the food it's a female.

Why is Tom Garrick gay Answer- Because he is

Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

roses are red violets are blue bannas are yellow so is my wife

Wow, so today is 9/11? Yes.

A viking walks into a bar, and orders 6 beers. the man working asks "why did you order so many beers?" the viking says"because one for me 6 brothers who were separated from me many years ago." then he leaves. the next morning the viking walks into the bar, and orders 5 beers.the man working says"im sorry for your loss." the viking says"what? oo no im just getting tierd of drinking!'

what do you call anybody eating at mcdohnalds? hungry, diabetic people

Why didn't the baby cry? It was stillborn.

What sentence on this site is the biggest cause of forever alone. "No comments yet. Be the first"

What job did the black man apply for?.. Several, its a downward economy.

What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, oceans and beaches are both not alive, thus incapable of speech and feeling emotions

If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is around, does anyone really care?

why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 is a bully. every day 7 ate 6's books and punches him. 6 would go to 9 but today 7 ate 9

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Stop shitting in my garden

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Drive an ax through its head.

Why did the donkey fall over Because it had A diabetic foot infection and had to have a non traumatic amputation of the lower hind leg.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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