An Asian walks out of the library.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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Why is it incorrect that the universe will end in 2012? Because profound idiocy doesn't always occur.

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What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree it can hurt you? A pool table.

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A man is approached by a mysterious character in the streets, offering to tell him a dark and amazing tale. The man declines and walks away.

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why did the boy named rylie white get aids Because he had unprotected sex with someone with aids.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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Why didn't Timmy have a girlfriend ??? Because he's a Fruit bowl !

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A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in the front of his pants. He is given some very strange looks from the patrons both due to the fact that he has a steering wheel in his pants and because people wearing traditional pirate garb are a rarity.

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What's the most common pickup line in a gay bar? "Hi, may I buy you a drink?"

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What is different between a pile of dead infants and a red ferrari? Being the victim of a mass murder.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

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Why was the ghost boy sad? He was attending his own funeral.

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Q: What do you call an American who has both Irish and Italian ancestry? A: An American.

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What do you call a Fish without the I? Astyanax mexicanus, or the Blind Cave variant of the Mexican tetra

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how do you get a taco? Buy one!

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, who shat in my garden

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I like toast -my name is Bob and I approve of this message

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? A watermelon doesn't scream when you cut it open.

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Why'd humpty dumpy fall of the wall? Someone threw a fridge at him

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A family's house was possessed by ghosts causing them great fear and discomfort. Who are they gonna call? A real estate agent.

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Whats the difference between babies and basketballs? You cant unload a truck of basketballs with a pitchfork.

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Jim: "Hey guess what" Bill: "What" Jim: "George Bush got reelected" *Bill proceeds to throw himself into the Atlantic Ocean.*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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