Hey guess what! We're birthday buddies! May 3rd.. Yeah that's why you should give me 5 bucks.

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If E = cos[(6x+8) + 5x!] + tan(90-X)^2, and x = 137/43, what is E? The fifth letter of the alphabet.

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Q: What did the alcoholic get for his Birthday?\ A: A Jail Sentence

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Q: Why was 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 was convicted of a murder, but was released due to lack of evidence, and 6 is very concerned for the protection of himself and his growing family.

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As little Timmy crossed the finish line his heart raced with excitement he had just won the big race. Later he and his family went home to celebrate they had pizza and chips and soft drinks. Then they played scrabble and watched spiderman 2. After that Timmy went to sleep. When his parents found him that morning they mourned and mourned because their hero little Timmy was still asleep.

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Whats fleash color flesh color and fleash color? a hodo rolling down a hill.

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A Jewish man walks into a grocery store. He purchases the items he needs and leaves.

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Somewhere in prison- Germany 1940 Janurary, Tuesday, 630PM: "Why doya' think you're so innocent" "It was only a jew!"

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Doctor! Doctor! There's a fly in my soup! Gross.

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Knock knock Who's there Police

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Why did Dom stop smoking He didnt I lied

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Chad Wolbert is retarded.

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What did Joan of Arc have for her last meal? Steak

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My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

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What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

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This is a sentence. This is also a senctence.

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What's small and red that sits in a corner? A baby with a razor blade.

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What's worse then finding a finger in your Chili? Getting Mollested by a Pterodactyl.

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whats red and looks like a bucket? a red bucket whats blue and looks like a bucket? a red bucket in disguise

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A bear walked into a bar and said to the bartender," I'd li.........................ke one beer please. " The bartender replied, " Sure. But why the big pause? "

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Why did the chicken kross the road? It didn't because it was a highway and it got hit by a bus.

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Your momma is so white, when she goes out in the sun it is necessary for her to use a lotion with an SPF greater than 30 because she burns easily and is also afraid of skin cancer.

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Why doesn't Charlie Sheen take showers? Because he spends too much time on MySpace.

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Why did octopus cross the road? Because the road was underwater

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops