Roses are red violets are blue, he is for me and not for you, he's too ugly you can have him

Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Bushes are Red, Trees are Red... my garden is on fire...

why does one side of a v-flock of geese have more birds? Because it does.

Are you from Africa? Because you're black.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road Because the light said don't walk

why was tommy so sad?............because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Why did the kid drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

What do you call a hickey on your shoulder? Bad aim -Cooper Simpson

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake? Dead.

How do you kill Chuck Norris? Short Answer: You can't.

roses are red violets are blue no one likes raisen bran except your mom

What kinds of children go to heaven dead ones

Teacher: Billy what do you want to be when you grow up? Billy: A fireman! Teacher: Tommy what do you want to be when you grow up? Tommy: 9/11

What's funny about using a shake weight? It resembles masturbating with a penis.

whats Mario's favorite kind of jeans? Denim, denim, denim.

What do an elephant and grapes have in common? They both have a trunk...except for the grapes

Good to know tattletale, I remember hating you back then when you betrayed me, but I cant wait to meet you again. Anyway Nero, I am a girl, its not about sex with me, I just had to tell you, and hope you will take better care of yourself, I know you used to be worried about your looks, and I just want you to understand ill be there for you no matter what. Thanks for the kind words Nero, I know you mean them, you never hid the fact that you found me attractive, but while I did not understand then why you would ruin every nice moment by saying something cheesy or rude, I think I get it now... I know you need rest, but can I arrive as soon as possible? Ill just wait outside or something, I wont be a bother I promise.

How many dead babies can fit in a dead horse 11

Why did the women knock on the door? she needed to do a shit

What has 4 legs and doesn't bark? A dead dog.

Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there was a red light and it was his turn to cross.

Why did the chicken sneeze? Because someone put pepper on its nose.

Whats the difference between a Duck? One of its legs are both the same.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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