Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van

Why did the women knock on the door? she needed to do a shit

What has 4 legs and doesn't bark? A dead dog.

What's 1+1? Window! Just kidding it's 2.

How many dead babies can fit in a dead horse 11

roses are red violets are blue no one likes raisen bran except your mom

Teacher: Billy what do you want to be when you grow up? Billy: A fireman! Teacher: Tommy what do you want to be when you grow up? Tommy: 9/11

What type of ruler lies? A shatter resistant one

What do an elephant and grapes have in common? They both have a trunk...except for the grapes

whats Mario's favorite kind of jeans? Denim, denim, denim.

Good to know tattletale, I remember hating you back then when you betrayed me, but I cant wait to meet you again. Anyway Nero, I am a girl, its not about sex with me, I just had to tell you, and hope you will take better care of yourself, I know you used to be worried about your looks, and I just want you to understand ill be there for you no matter what. Thanks for the kind words Nero, I know you mean them, you never hid the fact that you found me attractive, but while I did not understand then why you would ruin every nice moment by saying something cheesy or rude, I think I get it now... I know you need rest, but can I arrive as soon as possible? Ill just wait outside or something, I wont be a bother I promise.

What happens to the man with cancer He dies Because the pharmaceutical company wanted to profit off a synthetic drug equal to marijuana

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

The eighties called They were pretty exited about inventing a telephone that can call the future

I forgot how to throw a boomerang and then it came back to me.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

Meh, I dont want it anymore! You can have it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there was a red light and it was his turn to cross.

Why did the chicken sneeze? Because someone put pepper on its nose.

I saw a woman get donkey punched in the middle of the street. Nero the clit collector: You know... What is it called when A donkey kinda lifts its front hoove and hits a woman? ...WHAT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR COIN COLLECTION? YOUR STAMPS ARE MURDER! (or something) At least my uh... "Friends" survive... SOMETIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!! ...And then I kill them.

Whats worse then the quote "Do it, hit her!" The quote "Do it, Hitler!"

Whats the difference between a Duck? One of its legs are both the same.

roses are red violets are blue ur family is dead and u will die too

a fat man walks into a bar and gets laughed at because his shoes are untied

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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