How did the blonde burn her ear? In a terrible accident involving molten lava.

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What did the dog say to the cat? "Bark."

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Why can't you tell Knock-Knock jokes in a Japanese farmhouse? Because your fist will go through the rice paper.

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Q: why was the cow in the middle of the road? A: because it was dead

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What do you call the twin towers? An airport

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The king has three daughters. One day, one of the daughters comes into his room and asks, "Father, why is my name Rose?" King replies,"well, a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby." The next day, the second daughter comes into his room and asks,"Father, why is my name Tulip?" the king replies,"A tulip fell on your head when you were a bay." On the next day, the final daughter comes in and says, "BLAJSFUAGHASRAKKKKKK." The king says,"Shut up, Cinderblock."

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A Girl Who was very close to er grandmother got a text from her mom who was very new to texting, she thought lol meant "Lots Of Love" wel it turns out the Girl's Grandmother Passed away Sunday Morning And the Mom sent the text to the girl saying " Your Grandmother Got hit by a truck and died lol" the Girl Killed Herself that night becasue Of her mom, LESSON LEARNED< LEARN HOW TO TEXT.

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If I threw a regular snowball at a random snowman, would my action directly result in the increase of the snowman's size or would it rather have caused to snowball to become substantially larger in succession? Only a few people could answer that question. Not all of us are actually philosophy aficionados after all.

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Kathy Griffin.

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Your momma went to the gym, because she is fat.

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Why didn't the baby cry? It was stillborn.

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why was the little girl crying? because she was molested

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What is the answer to number 7 on the test? Time for you to get a watch.

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Question: Whats worse then getting hit by a bus? Answer: Getting hit by a train.

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What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

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An old couple walks up to me and says, "can you take our picture? It's our 50th anniversary." I reply, "sure." Then I pull the man to the side and ask, "how do you make a relationship last so long? I can't make one last 50 days let alone years." He leans in and says, "cheat"

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Your momma's so stupid that as a child she was often afraid to show her report card to her parents, for fear of their disapproval.

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Daniel Textor can suck a gooch he's such a F - A - GGGGG!! Let's beat him up at lunch.

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Roses are Red Violets are plucked So are my nose-hairs Pretty disgusting

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Halts Maul Reid. Das ist, was ich rede.

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Q.If you are European in the bathroom, what are you in the kitchen? A. A woman.

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Knock Knock It's the police, im afraid your wife has been killed in a horrible car accident.

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knock knock who's there? It's Jim we haven't seen each other since college Why hello there come on in

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A homosexual walks into a church

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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