why was the boy sad? because he was raped by a clown.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A duck flew calmly through the air and landed softly on a beautiful lake, where he was then shot for trespassing.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is brown and sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do u get when u mix a dinosaur and a lesbian? A-lick-alot-a-puss

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did Chuck Norris say when he saw a cop -Hi

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's black, white, has green stripes and smells like eggs? I don't know. That's why I'm asking.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

My mom gave me a quarter. I tryed to spend it on bubblegum but 7-11 said no...

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man walks into a bar and brings a Snickers. He gets a beer, eats the candy, and leaves leaving the wrapper. The bartender is angry with the littering but cleans it up and serves another customer.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he needed to get to the store across the street.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Text me back when you can. I can't, my fingers got amputated.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's funny? At the exact moment you read this, someone is suffering from domestic abuse.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What should you do if you come across a slut with a fork up her @ss and a gun in her hand? Do not look at her and walk away.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Minecraft.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A chronic hemophiliac walks into a bar. He cuts his leg and bleeds to death.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What I have learned about the Japanese studying video games and anime (read below for more, better studies): Student at school: USING PENN TO TYPU! USING PEN TO TYPU! Teacher: No Susaki San! You must onry yell the name of attakus! You suspension get! Student: JOSH! I CHARRENGE YOU TO MORTAR KOMBAT! Teacher: KAAAAAAAAMEEEEE HAAAAAAAAAAMEEEEEE! Student: FINAL FRAAAAAAASH! Student and teacher: Locked into energy wave combat for several hours. Teacher: Puh... Lets rather settle this with a round of Shaolin Soccer... Student: VICTOLY! Me: Well I saw a disturbing lot of Japanese people cosplay dressed as zangief... Skinny guys with fake chesthair and red hair that kept posing with their (nonexistent) muscles and yelling RED CYCRONE! Wanting me to take pictures of them... And Japanese lolitas, and blonde girls called Ganguro... Weirdest trip ever... They also kept Looking at Emanuel my (black) friend, and assumed he was my servant... Conclusion: My real trip to Japan was not so different from my above example as one might think...

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What does a baby sound like being cooked in the microwave. I don't know I was to busy masterbating.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

wsedrtyujiKFKJKLEFL;LKJRG Blame the economy. Don't hit me, I'm a girl! EQUAL RIGHTS, EQUAL RIGHTS!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

O.J. Simpson. What would you do in that situation?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How many penises is one metric butt-load. Oh God I hope you don't know the answer.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did little Jimmy say when he saw a group of dancing blue penguins dressed as cannibal clowns with saucers on their head ? "What the f*ck"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the wife leave her husband? Because they were having sexual differences and time restraints. The husband worked nightshifts as a nurse while the woman stayed home and took care of their child. The husband confessed he never wanted a child in the first place, and that having sexual intercourse with her didn't truly satisfy him.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops