What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? He received many presents because his parents loved him very much.

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Why did the blond play Russian roulette? She is very poor and needs the money so she can feed her son.

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Why are blondes stupid? They are not. Its just in America society has been given that impression through inaccurate and crude jokes.

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What did the widow get for mothers day A miscarriage

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Why did nick and tyler visit anti-joke.com? Because they have nothing better to do.

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A young girl falls off a swing, she is paralysed from the neck down and unable to walk every agian.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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A tiger walks into a bar. Clearly there is something wrong with animal control.

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whats white and cant climb a fence? a fridge

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What's worse than listening to Justin Beiber? Getting hit by a train.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Knock-knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

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What did the two fire men say to each other whilst a house was burning? Well be better put that fire.

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What did the blind kid get for Christmas? A collection of braile children's reading books.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud.

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What did the black man say to the man from Kyrgyzstan? I've never heard of your country before.

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- I shot the sheriff! - You murderer

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What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? The hooker is a human being whereas the onion is a vegetable.

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Yo mamma so fat, she probably has Type Two Diabetes - which is often associated with obesity - and should seek medical advice.

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Knock knock Who's There? Idk, who the **** names their kid There?

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banana

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obamas trench

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what did the duck say to the hawk? quack

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What did the Muffin say to the other muffin ? I dont know

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In Soviet Russia, You drive the car, fill it up with gas and park it Just like in America

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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