What do you call a chicken with it's head chopped off. A decapitated chicken.

A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. I don't know what happens next, I got the fuck out of there before shit went down

What Does Alex J Simpsons Face have in Common with his hand? Spaghetti

Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

Q: What's sad about seeing a dead twenty year old lying at the corner of a street with a beer bottle in his hand? A: He owed me twenty bucks.

What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick and could not speak at all during his final weeks.

Why did the blond play Russian roulette? She is very poor and needs the money so she can feed her son.

What do you call two gay black men? Homosexuals.

What's brown, liquid and bad for your health in large doses? Did you guess: Coca Cola? Soda? Beer? Pepsi? Wrong. It's beer. Did this Anti-joke sound pretentious? Don't worry, you're not the only one.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

In Soviet Russia, You drive the car, fill it up with gas and park it Just like in America

Q. What did Grandmother get Little Boy Johnny for Christmas? A. Nothing. She died on Thanksgiving Day.

What did 6 say to 7? Nothing, numbers are abstract concepts thought up by humans and therefore, they cannot speak or converse in any sort of language.

If file gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

What do you call a man with a bad haircut? A man with a bad haircut

Why are you going to thumbs this joke up? Because I use the words "Chuck Norris" Thus making it impossible to not thumbs up.

What's worse than getting a jigsaw puzzle for your birthday? Slavery

your mammas so fat she has to buy pants in the xxlarge section of the store

What do you call a black guy in college? A student.

Why did Charlie Sheen laugh at the TV? Because there happened to be a comedy on.

Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? There is no Santa Claus.

A man walks into a bar. He leaves when he realizes he is supposed to be at a business meeting

What has wheels and spins round and round? A dog in a wheelchair.

What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? My ass

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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