What did the man say to the woman he was in love with? Sure, I understand and I'm okay with being just friends.

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How did jimmy get hurt?? someone throw a fridge at him..

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What do you get when you put white cheese in a blender and turn it on? White cheese.

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What do you call a tennis match between Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder? An anachronistic hypothetical sporting event that would never happen.

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have a pleasant evening as they talk to each other about their day over a relaxing drink.

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what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing, he was homeless

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A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street when they see an orphanage on fire. "Oh my god!" says the rabbi. "We have to save the children!" "Screw the children!" says the priest. "Out of what?" replies the rabbi.

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Question: why did the pilot crash the plane? Answer: because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Q: Why is the earth round? A: I am Batman.

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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Why was the baby smoking? He was locked in a hot car.

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your momma's so fat i almost didn't have sex with her.... almost.

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What is more dangerous than heroine? T.J. Lane

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Watching your house burn down and your family scream in pain as their flesh burns and you suffer from chronic depression.

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Why is Osama bimladin dead? Because he was a threat to American for many years, and someone finally found him and killed him.

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A man walks into a bar, and says ouch.

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Why do you touch yourself at night? Because I do too

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

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i used to be gay. now i am bisexual.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Idk

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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maths is annoying!!! LIKE if you agree!!!!! :D

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Yo momma so lazy she hasn't been to work in weeks and you no longer have electricity or food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops