What did the lonely old man get on valentines day? Nothing, because his wife died of cancer two years ago.

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1 man walks up to a tiger and eats cheese toast with brownies and butter and wonders about the stars the end james

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, i'd put my penis in your mouth

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Why did the milkman die? Because everyone dies.

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two guys walk into a bar. the third guy ducks

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What do you call a black guy driving a Mercedes through New York? A U.S. Citizen

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What do you call a hot underaged girl. off limits i am her father.

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how many boys does it take to use 4 computers? 4.

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What happened to the cat that fell in the bath? It jumped out feeling cold and embarrassed.

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Why did the man bring the computer to the doctor because it had a virus

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How many WOMEN does it take to change a light bulb? YOU ALREADY KNOW ITS GONNA BE MORE THAN ONE!

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Doctor, Doctor, I feel like there's two of me! There's not. Your long lost twin died of terminal cancer.

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The nurse at a hospital came out of the delivery room and chucked the baby down the hall to the father. The dad starts crying and the nurse starts laughing and said, "It's ok, it was already dead."

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Communism, Capitalism and an Irish man walk into a bar. Communism says, “I’ll buy the drinks but I require your complete obedient consent.” Capitalism says, “No I’ll buy the drinks but I require that you pay me back with interest” and the Irish man says “No I… I don’t feel very well at all… Oh shite I’ve got the bloody runs!” He then proceeds to shit myself.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The sky is blue too

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Q: Why did Sally not like her trip to Hawaii? A: A volcano erupted and killed her whole family.

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What did the man say to the other man? You smell nice today.

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do want to hear a joke? Women's rights

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Your mother is so fat........... that she is morbidly obese and is at severe risk for diabetes and other weight related diseases.

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Two fish are swimming and hit a cement wall. One fish says Dam.

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What did the african american ninja say to the jewish bartender? Can I have a beer?

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WHO the FUK are Waseem ? and Jess ??!!!!

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im a dragon, no im not

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I'm wet Ew you perv.. Stop thinking like that ! I just took a shower.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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