what is small and is not fair Mitt Romneys tax rate

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Barack Obama.

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What did the blind kid get for Christmas? A collection of braile children's reading books.

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My doctor recommended I take anger management classes. That really pisses me off.

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national song of the mute person? 5 minutes of silence please

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Why did the Dr love drop hit guitar? Because a bear walked into a bar and killed everyone in there including dr love and was then shot to death by police and animal control.

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Why did the blond play Russian roulette? She is very poor and needs the money so she can feed her son.

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A cruise ship took sail. It was about a mile out into the water already. The blonde had missed the ship when it set sail. She was only capable of swimming a mile. She swam a half a mile out after the ship, and then turned around. She then later died due to a severe case of hypothermia due to the temperatures of the water for long periods of time.

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Why did the girl suck the other guy off? to get paid

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What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? My ass

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue Bitches Like U Belong In The Zoo

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Two men and a woman walk into a bar. They are all viciously murdered by a serial killer, who as he walks out, runs into a pole and suffers from a concussion, which he later dies from.

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Why did nick and tyler visit anti-joke.com? Because they have nothing better to do.

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How do you kill a baby quickly? The better question is why kill a baby quickly?

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What is Justin Bieber + One less lonely girl. A BABY

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? If so, you're probably a pervert.

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What did 6 say to 7? Nothing, numbers are abstract concepts thought up by humans and therefore, they cannot speak or converse in any sort of language.

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What do you call a man with a bad haircut? A man with a bad haircut

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What kind of society have we created that a chicken can't even cross a road without his motives being questioned?

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What's brown and sticky? A penis.

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What do all of these jokes have in common? They're not funny. You see, the definition of an anti-joke is a "type of indirect humor that involves the joke-teller delivering something which is deliberately not funny, or lacking in intrinsic meaning. The audience is expecting something humorous, and when this does not happen, the irony itself is of comedic value." As this is a page full of anti-jokes, we know to expect the unfunny - thus robbing us of the experience of an anti-joke.

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I'm the rubber and you're the glue, whatever you say sends vibrations through the air that hit my eardrum and my brain interprets these vibrations as what your are saying.

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Why did Charlie Sheen laugh at the TV? Because there happened to be a comedy on.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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