What did the blind kid get for Christmas? A collection of braile children's reading books.

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What do you get when you cross some eggs and some toast? Breakfast.

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What's the worst part about seeing a dead baby on the beach? The crushing sadness.

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What did the cow get for Christmas? A tree

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What's the animal that eats with its tail? All of them, since they won't take it off when they get to eat.

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Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why did the blond play Russian roulette? She is very poor and needs the money so she can feed her son.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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obamas trench

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Suzie has no arms and no legs and is on a swing. what happened? she fell and died knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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Two men and a woman walk into a bar. They are all viciously murdered by a serial killer, who as he walks out, runs into a pole and suffers from a concussion, which he later dies from.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he can't fly

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what did the duck say to the hawk? quack

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What did the Muffin say to the other muffin ? I dont know

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What's brown and sticky? A penis.

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What do you call a black guy in college? A student.

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Why i Hate people. They are alive. The are breathing. The are near me.

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Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

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what did the muffin say to the other muffin when they were in the oven? hi, im a muffin

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how do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? throw a mars bar off a cliff!

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what is small and is not fair Mitt Romneys tax rate

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are both eaten fifteen minutes later.

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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