- Anti Joke

-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Carl -Carl wh-wait... carl...CARL OH MY GOD!!!! WE ALL THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD ,CARL!!!! Where have you been? Oh my god... Mom's DEAD! When we all thought you were dead she hung herself! IT'S YOUR FAULT SHE'S DEAD, CARL! YOUR FAULT!!!!!! YOU ARE AN UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT CARL! YOU KNOW THAT? I hope you burn in hell.

SHE GOT A BIG BOOTY SO I CALL HER by her real name because she is a woman and worthy of my respect.

Two cannibals were eating a clown. One says to the other "Does this taste funny to you?!" ...Two days later, both of the cannibals became very ill with food poisoning. Always ensure meat is cooked thoroughly before eating.

Why did the black man rob the store? Because he was hard on money for a reason not associated with race or stereotypes whatsoever.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Chickens like to wander around.

So a Moose walks into this store, and walks up to the lady bitch, and he goes "Hey, lady bitch, where the potatoes?" So the lady bitch goes "Heheh, their in aisle 5." So the moose goes down aisle 5, and there aint no potatoes.

what do you get when you cross do you get when you cross a banana and a monkey? one happy monkey

A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

Justin Bieber is so gay he dates girls

What did the boy do before school? Jacked off.

How do you get a nun pregnant? You have sex with her

What do you call a blue baby at the bottom of a pool? Dead.

Why did the girl fall off her bike? Someone threw a piano at her.

knock knock who's there? John Oh, come in then

How do you keep a black man from robbing your house? Lock your doors, or perhaps get a update-to-date security system.

Your mother is so fat when she jumps she comes backs down.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

If you shaved Chuck Norris' beard, you'd find a chin.

these are shit

What do you call a man in the desert? Whatever his name is.

if life gives you lemons you probably have problems

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

What is better than winning the gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded