Roses are red Violets are blue I have a knife Take off your clothes

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I threw a fridge at her.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? It was moldy and it was a home of many roaches.

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"Hey, why won't you let me through?" "These tickets are fake." "No they aren't. LOOK OVER THERE!" The guard turns around, and then turns back. Minorly inconvenienced, he arrests the man immediately, upon which he is sent to jail and anally raped multiple times.

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What do you get when you hit a deer? A dead deer, which you should probably take home to eat - wouldn't want it to go to waste.

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If a tree falls in a neigheorohood lots of people hear it.

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Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy.

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What did the collage professor say to the plumber? Hi.

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What was the pirate movie rated? Pg-13

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Why couldn't the asian man drive? He had no arms.

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How does a gay take his pants off? Just like everybody else

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Why can't Susie jump rope? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! who's there? Not Susie.

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What do you call a duck In Africa ? Screwed

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Why did the little girl die Because she was kidnapped by a rapist, and defiled repeatedly, and then to get a ransom from her family the kidnapper slowly pulled out her fingernails and toenails, and sent them to the family the same thing happened with her fingers, toes, hands, feet, arms, legs, teeth, tounge, hair, and eyes, then she died of blood loss after nearly 2 months of torture.

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Somewhere over the rainbow.... Is land.

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A man walks into a bar. After several hours of drinking and loud unintellegable outbursts to those around him, the man wonders off to a nearby bus stop and relieves himself. He is now a registered sex offender.

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If you shaved Chuck Norris' beard, you'd find a chin.

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What do you call a man in the desert? Whatever his name is.

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these are shit

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if life gives you lemons you probably have problems

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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What is better than winning the gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

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what do you get when you cross do you get when you cross a banana and a monkey? one happy monkey

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Chickens like to wander around.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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