She is so fast We call her Email Instead of Emily...

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Knock knock. who's there? Alex. GO AWAY!!!

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One cold winter day in Russia, a man asked a tree if he was cold. The tree did not reply, and the man became depressed.

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What do you call it when a black man and a japanese woman get married? A wedding.

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What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a train

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Just kidding, it got hit by a car on the way to the other side.

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What's black and white and red all over? Two nuns in a chainsaw fight.

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Q: How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Well considering the weight of a fly is 1.2 grams, and the weight of a light bulb is 50 grams (and this is assuming that the fly can lift its own body weight) it would take 41.6 flies. But also considering the fact, that the .6th of a fly is impossible, because it is more than likely to be deceased, it is impossible for flies to screw in a light bulb.

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Your mother is a very respectable woman.

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Why did the irishman go to the bar? because he was a designated driver and was picking up his friend.

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A jewish man, a black man, and a redhead walk into an electronics store. Because they work there.

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Bird jokes are not funny! Crow up!

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Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack addiction. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And is then a homeless broke man who does not even have 4 quarters to his name.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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What do you call a black man climbing a mountain. A mountain climber.

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What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

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Your mama is so fat... Haha, that's a good joke.

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Why did the girl fall off her bike? Someone threw a piano at her.

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Men's Sports

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How did Hitler fit 100 Jews in his car? Ashes don't take up much space.

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What does a bartender say to almost all of his customers? May I please see your I.D.

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Roses are Violets, Violets are Roses, I am a dumb ass, The Hobbit.

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why was the guy stranded on an island? because his boat crashed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops