why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was DEAD!

What's red and has a mask ? Blood, I lied about the mask.

i jack off in the school bathroom #yolo -toby limbers

your mums so fat she has to use a matress as a tampon

What do you call a black man inside a house that is on fire? A fire fighter as well as a hero since he was probably inside the house searching for anyone who was trapped inside

knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock kock ding dong ding di-ding dong zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz sigh weeeeeeeeeewooooooooooooooooo zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz hey yo wake up zzz-oh-huh-what-whos there i've been yelling for like five minutes oh sorry jim will you let me in already all right

What's the difference between a cup of tea and a polar bear? A polar bear is a bear whilst a cup of tea is a beverage

Why dont you ever see black people at night? Because the majority of people sleep during the night, including the african americans

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

what is long and bare? polonaise to the pediatric ward what is short and bald? same polonaise, 3 weeks later

KASEEM IS CRAP AT GEARS OF WAR THIS IS NOT A JOKE ITS TRUE (FACT) PLAYSTATION IS BETTER THEN XBOX (BIGGEST JOKE EVER) IV HAD BOTH, SO SHUT UP PS3 BOYS AKA GIRLS

Mitt Romney penis

Your mama is so stupid that she thought Brendan Fraser was a good actor.

why do woman travel in packs? because men don't travel like the sisterhood in the traveling pants

How do you get a baby in a blender? Feet first so you can see the expression on it's face. How do you get it out ? Nacho chips!

whats green and has wings ? a flying patch of astro turf

How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? usually one new yorker.

Have you heard about the Polish kamikaze pilot? No, you haven't, because it would be historically and culturally incorrect.

what did the mom with cancer get for christmas? radiation poisoning

What's the difference between watermelon and baby? I don't eat watermelon.

what do you call anybody eating at mcdohnalds? hungry, diabetic people

What is 9 + 10? 21

-if you're American in the kitchen, British in the living room, what are you in the bathroom? -in the bathroom.

Q: What did the latino kid get for christmas? A; Nothing because he died two days before

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...