Why was Sally crying She got a high five In the face With a chair

What stands on the corner oof every major city at night? A cop

An boy with ADHD walks into a

How do you make friends with a squrriel? Trust me, don't.

Suddenly the Titanic started sinking, its a shame it sunk before anyone managed to find out what it was sinking about.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless you're paralyzed.

roses are violets red is blue i like doughnuts doughnuts are good

What d u tell Simba when he's moving to slow? Muvasa

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 10 black guys? In this situation, the minority.

Q: how do you make a baby blow bubbles? A: hold it under water, or as an alternative you could hold it under its twin sisters blood.

why wouldnt sally stop spinning? she was trapped in a washing machine

your mom is so old. she can legally get a senior discount

Because you killed my Llama. He was my best-friend.

Why did the house burn down? Because I set it on fire.

Roses are red Voilets are blue I have a gun Get in the Van

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

What did the person with down syndrome do? He mumbled for a while, chewed on his thumb, fell flat on his face, and died.

A dog walks into a saloon and says "I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw." The patrons are afraid of the talking dog.

Batman, Superman, Spiderman and Wonder Woman walk into a bar. The bartender decides to ruin the joke by saying nothing.

What do you call a young child being beating to death with a spiked club? Arousing.

Teacher: Billy what do you want to be when you grow up? Billy: A fireman! Teacher: Tommy what do you want to be when you grow up? Tommy: 9/11

Why did the baby die? Abortion

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is.." "'Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is' who?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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