How do you get three Canadians out of a pool? Say "Hey guys time to get out of the pool."

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How do you do you cure cancer? Very carefully.

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"Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, I have Alzheimer's. "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, I have Alzheimer's. "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, I have Alzheimer's.

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What do you call an Arab on a plane? A passenger, you racist!

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You’re so dumb that many individuals find your intelligence inferior.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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Think about it: Is mexico REALLY full of: Lowrides in candy ass sparkly colors such as lip red that bounce, (manly color right? Yeah sure baggot) which contains a whole street war gang of members inside and at least twenty tons of COCAINA! ...But does not have a horn that plays "la cucaracha" Seriously, you say yes right? Hey look at this guy he said yes everybody, but ITS WROOOOOOONG CUCARACHA OR GTFO OF MEXICO! Yeah... Because Mexico is shit, id would be racist if Mexicans didn't agree...

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Q: why was the cow in the middle of the road? A: because it was dead

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Why was the baby ant confused? Because his uncles were ants

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You Know Wats Funny? Jokes....

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A priest walks past a mailbox with the number 666 on it. Nothing happens, because it is an ordinary mailbox.

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Wanna here a joke? Feminism.

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Who would win in a fight between a polar bear and a tiger? Considering that they live in different habitats, the chances are very unlikely that they would ever interact.

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What did the black guy, the latino guy, and the asian guy all have in common? They were all human beings

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How many dead jews can you fit in a hole? Ask hitler.

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A man walks into a bar. He has suffered from a concussion and is now in the emergency room.

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And Judas approached the rabbis and Pharisees saying, "The one whom I kiss is the one you seek. " To which they responded, "Gay. "

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What do you call a pair of banana peels? Trash.

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What is the hardest part about rollerblading? Most commonly the balance part.

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How do you keep children off your front lawn? Molest them.

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What is black and white and red all over? Two Nuns in a chainsaw fight.

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Knock Knock Who's there? I don't know Then why should I care I don't know

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If Jimmy has 60 candy bars and eats 50 of them, what does he have? Diabetes.

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What did the fat man with scissors do? Cut off the foreskin of your penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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