Whats not green and cant pee? Not a pea!

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Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third guy ducks.

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Mindfuck: They call you a patient where medics are because they do not want you to become impatient. The Coronel is the Kernel of the army (coronel sounds a lot like coronel no?) Sergeant = Sir gent. as in Sir gentle(man) Ok, so if you experience insanity one day, does that make you insane forever? In that case I was born and will die hungry and thirsty. Sigmund Freud= Sickman fraud. General: The guy you should generally listen to if you are in the army. 3.14 ratebay = PIRATE BAY! Why is Satan the antichrist, humans killed him :P Satan only "tempted his thirsty brother with water at the desert" Jesus showed real power by saying "NO WATER WHEN I AM THIRSTY IS BAD FROM MY BROTHER!"

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Whats worse than an offended chicken walking around with a squirrel stapled to its back? A crusty old man with hepatitis peeing on 10 babies.

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Why did the man order fried chcken? I have twelve dead babies in my trunk.

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maths is annoying!!! LIKE if you agree!!!!! :D

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what's the difference between a black man and a lift? both can raise babies, a part from the black man

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What's the difference between a cup of tea and a polar bear? A polar bear is a bear whilst a cup of tea is a beverage

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There once was a squirrel. He lost his nuts.

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Your Mom.

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why did the frog cross the road? because he was attached to the duck

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your father died

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How did the black man get to work this morning? He didn't. He had been struggling with depression and finally this morning, he committed suicide.

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So there was this Afghan with a backpack on a train... he was going to work.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was DEAD!

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I threw a fridge at her.

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Why was the manspenis big Cause he was a lucky bastard

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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Knock Knock Who's there? I bought a Jeep

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Anti-Joke Memes? That Shouldn't Be A Thing

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In soviet Russia - some people were poor.

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How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

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1: Knock. Knock. 2: Don't come in I'm naked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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