Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia Roses are red

What is worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse, thus lacking cognitive capacity to speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and promptly defecates on the floor then gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few chairs and tables.

Why was the white man rich and the black man poor? Because when the white man was 11 and he didn't have a job because 11 year olds don't get hired, because its not legal, he use to pick up pennies. And when the black man was 11 he got a job mowing lawns and ended up being a lawyer graduate and spent the rest of his life paying off his school loan. The white man lived in the 70's and the black man lived in he twentieth century.

What's the difference between a turtle and a horse? The horse has no shell.

This is you cat This is just cat This is wasted cat This is your cat This is time cat This is reading cat This is this cat Now read the third word of every sentance

a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar... they sit down, have a deep and meaningful conversation about theism, and don't really drink anything.

A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother than explains to the daughter the logistics of sex. The daughter seems to comprehend and walk away leaving the mother to cook.

What's black and makes me food? A microwave.

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What is invisible and smells like rabbits? Bunny farts.

Why did the dog stop barking. It was given a good reason to.

A serial killer kills a family of 5 He is never found and eventually kills himself from depression

What did the Penis say to the Condom? Nothing. The human organ is not able to talk to another inanimate object, therefore it's impossible.

A fat man and his dog walk into a bar...the man buys a beer and walks out

Why did the asian man crash into the stop sign? Because there was a frog stapled to his face.

Q: What's worse than being forced to eat your veggies? A: Being forced to kill your parents with a carrot.

I just flew in from Chicago and boy are my legs cramped

What do you call a mexican riding a lawnmower? Promoted

Wanna know something fishy? A fish

whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew?... Nevermind, that was a stupid question.

Have you heard about the Polish kamikaze pilot? No, you haven't, because it would be historically and culturally incorrect.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing!!

Your mama is so stupid that she thought Brendan Fraser was a good actor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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