Your best friend is different from a dead person. The best friend will die if you shoot him in the head but the dead person won't die, he's already dead.

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Why does Nathan Rogers never get any pussy? Because goblins have small dicks

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Want to hear a cat joke? Just kitten.

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What happened to all of the happy birds flying over the field? They were all suddenly stricken by the bird flu and died.

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Twenty-Four

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A man walks into a doctors and says 'Doctor, Doctor, I have a bad stomach ache' Upon hearing this, the doctor writes the man a prescription for medication and wishes him a swift recovery.

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What happened to the lady with cancer?? She got shot!!

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The answer: He is dead! (read it throughout so you cant go wrong) Question: So why cant a man in Italia marry his widows sister? Moral: Had yet to read one like this one...

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What do you a call a guy on steroids? A Body Builder

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How do you kill a circus? Go for the Juggler!

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted. You're adopt...wait what?

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Who has killed more people than Jeffrey Dahmer, John Wayne Gacy, and Jack Kevorkian combined? Mr. Rogers

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What is purple and crawls? A wounded grape.

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A man on crutches walked across the road. Suddenly he fell and sprained his foot. He was pleased that he was carrying crutches.

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released into a nearby park.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is.." "'Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is' who?"

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Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob What What the hell are you doing here

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What is funny about a child with down syndrome? Nothing.

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In Soviet Russia, millions of innocents died due to the oppression.

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what happened to the boy that walked down the street he got hit by a falling street light

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Why couldn't Helen Keller see or hear? She was blind and deaf.

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Let's see how many dislikes this can get!

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If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, how many does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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