Did you hear about the big Polish tragedy? There was a power outage in Poland's busiest shopping mall, People were stuck on the escalators for 4 hours. A woman gave birth in the elevator and died.

What did one cancer patient say to the other? Nothing, both of them were dead.

What's the difference between erotica and kink? Erotica involves simple arousal; kink usually has an added element of masochism.

why did the chicken cross the road to get to your house knock knock whos there the chicken

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Yo mamma's so stupid she sits on the TV and watches the couch. :) By Drew Bolton

I have a crush on my dad.

What did the man say when he lost his keys? "Where's my keys?!"

A: Knock Knock B: ...

What did the African-American get for Christmas? Nothing. I did mention he was African-American, right?

A blonde walks into a bar and orders a drink. The end.

What do you call something that isn't funny? Serious

Why did the man fall from the sky? Because he was dead.

Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to a chicken

"Do you wanna hear a funny joke?" Yeah, Sure! "A funny joke."

3 men were involved in a terrible plane crash. The first man got up, and all he could see was blue. Blue houses, blue cars, blue people. He walked into a house and asked if he could stay there, the kind people complied and let him stay there for the night. When he woke up he could still only see blue. He went down stairs and ate fruit loops, then left in his blue world. The second man got up and all he could see was red. Red houses, red cars, red people. He walked into a house and asked if he could stay there, the kind people complied and let him stay there for the night. When he woke up he could still only see red. He went down stairs and ate cherrieos, then left in his red world. The last man got up, and all he could see was yellow, yellow cars, yellow houses, and yellow poeple. Yet again he walked to a house, and the kind people let him stay the night. Once he woke up, he only could see yellow still. He went down stairs and ate fruit loops and left into his yellow world. So this proves that 2 out of 3 men prefer fruit loops over cherrieos.

What's black and twelve inches long? A Maglite.

Johnny Manziel is the best quarterback ever (this isn't a joke only a true statement)(this is a remake of a previous joke)

What is green and has weels? A green bycicle.

How do you make a model ugly? you shoot her in the face.

It's a man's 100th birthday, and as one of his last wishes he wants to go skydiving. Unfortunately, due to his crippling arthritis, he was unable to pull the rip cord on his parachute and plummeted to his death.

What do you call a penis without hair? Apple sause

i am an inbred jew who likes penis up my bum ~Nathan Barras

Womens rights.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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