Whats the difference between a pontiac and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a pontiac in my garage.

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? -Its a chicken you dumb shit.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Joe Joe who? Your friend Joe OK come in

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Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate the mac and cheese before it was cool.

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Wombat monkey juice.

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What do you call a pair of banana peels? Trash.

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What happens to the man with cancer He dies Because the pharmaceutical company wanted to profit off a synthetic drug equal to marijuana

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How did the fat woman survive the car accident? She had on her seat belt.

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Wow, so today is 9/11? Yes.

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Why did the prostitute survive the gunshot? She was wearing a bulletproff vest.

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What do you do when you fall of the horse? Consider calling the paramedics because it's possible that when you hit the ground your brain sustained damage and you should be rushed to a hospital immediately.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Drive an ax through its head.

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Why dont you ever see black people at night? Because the majority of people sleep during the night, including the african americans

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What do a fish, a can of asparagus, a spool of thread, and a car tire have in common? Nothing.

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What's funnier than 24? 25

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knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock kock ding dong ding di-ding dong zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz sigh weeeeeeeeeewooooooooooooooooo zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz hey yo wake up zzz-oh-huh-what-whos there i've been yelling for like five minutes oh sorry jim will you let me in already all right

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what do you call anybody eating at mcdohnalds? hungry, diabetic people

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Q. Why did the middle-aged man need glasses? A. The man's father had poor eyesight and therefore could not see well without the help of glasses.

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how did they guy with no legs in the wheel chair walk? he couldnt because he had no legs.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding A Duck in your apple! What is worse than finding a duck in your apple? Finding a racist in your apple! Whats worse than finding a racist in your apple? DEATH

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was a rapist.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Daises are red, holy crap my garden is on fire.

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Who is the worst teacher ever? Mrs. Thompson

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What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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