Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. It was a dead monkey.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

What's worse than losing something? Dieing.

Why couldn't Bethany drive? She was 14.

Knock knock --Come in.

What did the priest say to Jesus when he revealed himself on Christmas morning? Happy birthday

An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then delivered by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their mass execution.

Q:how man ADD kids does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: I dont know, wanna go ride bikes?

why do all good things come to an end? that is one of the mysteries of human existance.

Whats worse than finding out that your family is dead? finding a worm in your apple

Strawberries!

"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" "It's who's." The grammar nazi has struck again.

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names

Why is Roenz Gay? He isnt.

"I can't wait to eat this bagle!" "Yes you can." "Yeah, I guess you're right."

What do a bench and a mexican have in common? (don't worry it's not racist) You'll find both in a park. (I lied)

Why can't Abraham Lincoln lie? Because he is dead.

How are contortionists so flexible? They stretch.

Why couldn't the old lady take her Afghan Hound to the vet after the dog had been brutally harassed? She was dead.

Yo mama so fat... Her doctor told her she's morbidly obese and she has 2 years to live if she doesn't change her eating habits and exercise regularily.

Pee Pee bleekkka klup look? fupapapapapapapapap

A man goes to see his doctor and says "Doctor, I have a pain in my leg." The doctor replies "That's the least of your worries, I ran your blood test and you have AIDS."

Why did the man Iorn his face? Because he felt like it.

one day 2 strawberrys walked to the ice cream store and ordered a small cup of banana ice cream they were realley happy they were later taken in and tortured and raped

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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