Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears? Because he's a rabbit

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What is the difference between a cow and a human? A lot of things.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

TEAM Together Everyone Argues More

thumb_up thumb_down +35

terry stockton is straight

thumb_up thumb_down +35

I can't see my forehead

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the coconut fall out of the tree? Gravity.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

how long does it take for a black woman to poop? women dont poop, especially not halle berry

thumb_up thumb_down +33

One day a cheerio is walking down the street. Nothing special, just a regular cheerio. Suddenly, he sees a honey-coated cheerio. Now, honey-coated cheerios have a much higher social status than regular cheerios. So he decides that he wants to become a honey- coated cheerio. He works really, really hard and one day his boss promotes him to a honey-coated cheerio. So, he's really pleased about this, he can easily pay his rent, he gets a nice car, and his family is much happier. But then, as he's driving around the town, he sees a sugar-coated cheerio. Now, sugar-coated cheerios are preety much at the top of society. They're all highly regarded and respected. So he decides that he wants to become a sugar-coated cheerio. He works really, really hard for months and months, until one day his boss decides that he can become a sugar-coated cheerio. He is absolutely stoked with this. He gets a bigger house with a swimming pool and a spa, really nice clothes, and he's very well respected. One day, he's sun bathing at the beach, when off in the distance he sees an island that he had never seen before. Apparently, this is the golden cheerio island. Cheerios there fly around in jet cars and lounge around in bars. It's cheerio heaven. So he decides that if he becomes a golden cheerio, his life will be complete. He dedicates his life to working really, incredibly hard, and one day his boss says to him, "You know what, you've worked so hard that I'm promoting you to a golden cheerio." So he makes it to the cheerio island, and as he is lying down, relaxing, he suddenly becomes very thirsty. All cheerios really like milk so he goes to get some, but there's a really long line at the milk stand. So he decides to get some lemonade, but like the milk stand, there's a really long line at the lemonade stand. So he thinks, "I know what no-one will want. Punch!" So he goes to the punch stand and sure enough there's no punch line.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did Susie fall off her swing? She had no arms Nock nock Who's there? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What's worse than this joke? Taking a dump on an airplane as it crashes in to the World Trade Center.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the chicken cross the road Time for you to get a watch

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Where did Ellen go after the explosion? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Do you know what is dead on the carpet ? Your mother

thumb_up thumb_down +33

you know whats not funny? the Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the man say to the really attractive woman? We are different genders

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? This isn't a car

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the blonde say to the other blonde? What's up

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? 17

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Roses are red, violetes are blue, Your monkey sucks.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

whats orange, nocturnal, and hurts to the touch? The sun or an orange owl... Depends on your preference

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How much does a polar bear weight? The average male polar bear weights about 1500 lbs (680 kg)

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What's worse than a 15 year old getting hit by a car? Adam Johnson

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A Man buys a Prius. Hated it.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops