whats orange, nocturnal, and hurts to the touch? The sun or an orange owl... Depends on your preference

What did the blonde say to the other blonde? What's up

A Man buys a Prius. Hated it.

what is Justin Bieber+ One Less Lonely girl.... A BABY

Parents: What do you want for your birthday? Boy: A yellow ping pong ball. 7th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball 13th birthday P: What would you like for you birthday son? B:A yellow ping pong ball. P:Hmm, fine. 17th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: That's is I'm getting you a car! Day before 18th the boy drives into a bridge. He lies in his hospital bed and his parents are there. P: What would you like for you birthday tomorrow? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: Fine. Why do you want these ping pong balls anyway? B: Because. And then he died.

So two cannibals are eating a clown. Cannibal one: Does this taste funny to you? Cannibal two: Considering that this man was a clown he must have been in poverty so he resulted to being an alcoholic and maybe over dosed on over the counter drugs. Cannibal one: Thank you for that reasonable answer.

how do you get to your favorite chinese restaurant? Wok.

A man who can't spell walks into an Arab.

Why do immigrants move to the UK? To seek a better life

why did the kid get chemotherapy? because he had cancer

Q) what do girls like long , soft (can go hard) and has white stuff come out A) Twinkies but if left out of its plastic wrapping for a long period of time it will go hard

How do you make a clown sad? You hit him in the face with axe

Why is it incorrect that the universe will end in 2012? Because profound idiocy doesn't always occur.

Wanna hear a funny joke? Look at the last joke.

Why did the groom have cold feet? Because he was insecure in his relationship with his soon to be wife.

a blind man walks across a road. he's dead

Why did the chicken eat fried chicken? Because fried chicken is so good! Kelvin Yang.

A white guy, a black guy, and a spanish guy jump off a building. They all die on impact and their families mourn their loss for years to come.

Not sure, its just a really rare combination, people tell me stuff like "oh they are really bright brown" like hell they are, I mean sorry but the hell they are. I prefer it the way you say it, they are red, really really red, and you do not say it as if I had something to be ashamed off.

Why doesn't Santa Claus give presents to African children? Because Santa Claus isn't real.

A bartender walks into a bar. It's his shift.

Who can make 50 iPads in 1 hour? An Asian

What do you call a banana that just got pealed A banana

What did the kid with no arms and no legs gets for Christmas? Cancer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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